It’s not quite been a year since I’ve posted, but close enough.

I had every intention of getting things going, but life gets in the way sometimes. I have to admit, most of the time, I think it’s me getting in my own way. I mean, I’m the one who says yes to too many things and then wonders why I don’t have time for anything else. I’m also the kind of person who tends to ignore things if I don’t know what to do, so trying to learn how to do things can be an uphill battle.

I actually did sit down and record a podcast episode. One of my closest friends was always poking me to get going, so I sent him a picture of me finally sitting down to record it and he texted me back the heart eyes emoji and said “I’m literally fan girl squealing.” I promised I’d send him the link when it was edited and posted. But I never got a chance – he passed away five days later.

At some point, my computer restarted without me knowing, and everything I recorded was gone because I forgot to save it. I’ve been struggling to re-record it, partly because I’m just struggling emotionally, but I’m also now heartbroken that one of my biggest cheerleaders is gone and will never get to hear it. I know he’d want me to carry on – he would be so annoyed if I used him as an excuse to not do it. His friends are getting together to give him a proper sendoff this weekend, and then I think that enormous weight of grief will lift a bit for the time being, and I will feel like carrying on is honoring his memory rather than disrespecting it.

So at some point soon, I promise I will have an episode for you. It will likely be within the next couple of weeks, in a month at the latest. Summer seems to be when things quiet down for me because I just don’t really enjoy it. I’ll be really happy to have an excuse to stay in and read.

In the meantime, read good books and talk to your friends. And take the damn selfies when you’re out together – I have a whopping five pictures with the two of us in them from a 15-year friendship, and man, was that upsetting to see.